Mickey Mouse in a side scrolling multi-roomed adventure. Plus Mickey kills stuff. I know it wouldn't be much of a game if there wasn't some element of danger involved, but I never really saw Mickey as much of an action hero.
In this game you are Mickey Mouse. Well, actually you look more like Mickey the undernourished sewer rat. Mickey is seriously tiny in this game, like ten pixels tall. He wears the traditional Mickey mouse pants. Mickey's incredible abilities include the power to jump over stuff. He can also climb ladders.
As I mentioned before Mickey kills things in this game. While the majority of games out there feature some kind of way for your character to kill or otherwise incapacitate enemy characters, most of the time it's handled tastefully. Take Super Mario, who jumps on top of turtles and bops them on the head. Nice, innocent, innocuous. Mickey however throws lethal ninja stars that make his enemies explode from the inside out on contact. And explode they do in an audible "BOOM!" with puffs of smoke and no trace of them left behind. Why couldn't Mickey just crush things to death like every other cutesy video game cartoon character?
The point of Mickey's adventure seems to just go around and kill other cute things who's crime seems to be that they exist. They all seem to be innocent members of the plant or animal kingdom who are just trying to survive, little spiders, worms, mushroom men, etc. All they want to do is walk back and forth on little platforms, minding their own business. Then comes this midget sewer rat with his exploding cartoon ninja stars of death to rain destruction and pestilence all up on their parade. It must suck living in video game land if any over-the-hill mascot can show up and ruin your shit just because you were in their way.
Mickey isn't alone in this genocidal slaughter of innocents, because when you get a power up Minnie shows up and joins your rampage of death. She's also your typical tag-a-long bitch, always falling into water and pits and such, causing you to die when you make the jump and she doesn't. On level two Minnie learns this incredible trick where she gets swept away by waves that Mickey can easily jump over. What the hell, mice can't swim or some shit? I decided to test this out; I went to the pet store, got a mouse, and threw it in the ocean. I couldn't tell if he made it back to shore or not, but goddammit the mouse was swimming fine last I saw of him.
Minnie's one saving grace is that she doesn't take any damage from bad guys, allowing you to use her to kill certain bosses very easily. Too easily. An obvious game play bug that even me as a ten year old was able to figure out and exploit. Good job on this game dumbasses.
Oh yeah, you also save a "mystery person" who gets kidnapped. Turns out it's Alice from Alice in wonderland. So all these people had to die for a woman. There goes Mickey again, always thinking with his crotch. Goddammit I hate mice.
If you enjoy games of formerly cute mice slaughtering the innocent denizens of cartoon land who are just minding their own business then please, buy this game. You sick bastard.
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