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Smurfs: Rescue in Gargamel's castle


Coleco 1982








Back in the day I was a huge Smurfs fan for some reason that I just can't understand today. Watching those cartoons as an adult is just so embarrassing. They're not even funny. They're weird blue people who all wear the same clothes. Maybe I was just stupid when I was a kid. Anyway, this game exemplifies perfectly why the game market crashed in 1984, a high profile title based on a lucrative licence that just sucks major loads of ass.

The game looks and sounds good (and arguably has the best graphics you're going to see on a Colecovision game,) it's just so simple. Your Smurf is endowed with incredible abilities, such as the ability to jump, duck, and walk left and right. Damn.

Look at the screen on the lower left there. The object of that screen is to walk to the right and jump over that white fence. That's it. The screen on the lower right has the incredibly difficult obstacle of jumping over a tuft of grass. The rest of the game contains similar challenges, jump over a log, dodge a flying bat, jump onto a ledge, etc. Rescuing Smurfette consists of jumping up onto a table, dodging Azreal's claw that does the same animation over and over again, and walking into her. Game over.

To be fair the difficulty does increase slightly the next time around. Now you have to dodge two bats! Holy crap this game is hard!

They could have done so much more with this game. I distinctly remember my Dad returned the Colecovision because he thought this game was crap (which greatly upset my brother and me.) Now I see what he was talking about. When I was six this game was like playing the cartoon. I guess this proves that old saying, you can never enjoy a dumbass game that captivated you as a little child when you're gown up and like, have an education and stuff. Or something. I don't know. I am tired now.


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